Okay, so I have quite a few days worth of adventures to catch up on.
On Wednesday I drew for the first time since the horrific days of Mr. Sanders at Jubilee. I think it's been maybe 10 years? I don't know. Some ridiculous amount of time. For those of my readers who aren't familiar with that particular chapter in the history of my life, I will summarize: When I was younger I had a terrible art teacher who only drew and painted completely realistic representations of real life and therefore only taught drawing and painting of completely realistic representations of real life. Nothing abstract. Nothing impressionist. Nothing even remotely interesting. At all. (Not even other artforms, like sculpting or printing. Just drawing and painting. Mainly drawing.) I was terrible at making realistic-looking 3D-type images. Therefore I was a terrible artist, at least by his standards. I never got anything higher than a C in the 6 years I had art class with this man, and therefore visual art was ruined for me. It wasn't even so much the poor grades that did it. It was more the manner he had. He wasn't encouraging at all. He didn't attempt to cultivate an interest or love of art in me. He only criticized and discouraged. He thought I wasn't trying hard enough. He had no idea what to do with a child who had no adeptitude (or interest even) in 3D drawing. I don't know if it never occurred to him that there might be some other approach to art that was more suited to me, or if he just didn't care. All I know is, he did nothing. Except to continue doing and teaching exactly what he had been. For six years. Thus, I came to loathe and even fear the idea of drawing. So much so that when Kristoffer suggested that I join his drawing class in Piazza di Minerva and actually draw something of my own, I froze in terror and actually experienced a tightness in my chest, that's how much anxiety the idea produced in me. I told him no, that I couldn't possibly, that I was terrible at drawing, why would he ask me to do such a thing? Then I thought about it and decided to act more like the enlightened, liberated, self-actualized adult that I am. Sure, I thought, why
can't I draw? So off I went. At first I didn't even know what to do. I had this enormous sketch pad sitting in my lap with all this empty, intimidating white space. Finally Kristoffer just started placing various drawing implements on the corner of the sketch pad, and so, very timidly, I began painfully attempting to depict my skewed view of the piazza. It was so very awkward at first, but then slowly, gradually, I picked up speed and became more engrossed. Hours later, my drawing was "finished", and mortified as I was by its inferiority in every respect, it felt good to have done it. It's these little daily triumphs that make the difference in rebuilding the confidence that was stripped from me so early in life, in so many ways.
On Thursday I got up early to head into the city for my Bible Study. I got there a little early, and upon a little exploration of the piazza, I found a great little coffee bar where I enjoyed a yummy, yet inexpensive, cappuccino before joyfully heading over to the church. I'm SO glad they're doing this study right now. It's very fortuitously timed, and the women are just wonderful, especially the pastor's wife Cathy, with whom I've already become fairly chummy. After meeting up with Kristoffer for a quick lunch, I made my way over to the Basilica di Santa Maria sopra Minerva, where the New English Orchestra was giving a free concert. It was pretty decent, and I hung around afterwards to take some photographs of the church, which was gorgeous. Then I went over to the nearby Pantheon and did likewise. Finally I returned to the church for choir practice, which was a pretty small affair, but it was still nice to be singing again. I have found myself in a situation where my rather strong voice is quite needed, and I was immediately entreated to be worked into the rotation of soloists. I was also asked if I sang in weddings, because apparently the pastor is often asked if he has a professional singer for hire for such purposes. So hopefully something will eventually come of THAT. One additionally cool and random thing that happened that day was witnessed by me only because I happened to arrive in Piazza San Lorenzo in Lucina quite a bit early for choir rehearsal. So I found a cozy spot to sit and read for a while. There happened to be a business in the piazza that was making a rather large to-do over displaying the new Toyota model or something like that. The only aspect of it that interested me was that they were blaring live music into the piazza, which made for a nicer background noise than the usual hustle and bustle of people in the city streets. At some point they had a couple of acrobats come out and perform a routine in the piazza, which was mildly interesting. But THEN, one of the acrobats started
contact juggling! For those of you unfamiliar with this mesmerizing art form, it is just about the coolest thing you've ever seen. I was first exposed to it in the film Labyrinth (incidentally, my favorite movie). But this was the first time I had ever seen it in
person! I couldn't get my camera out fast enough. Unfortunately, I only got one shot even remotely in focus, because it was getting dark, and his hands were moving too fast. The photo in no way does justice to the absolute and undeniable coolness of the skill, but here it is anyway:
On Friday I went into the city to meet Elena, the 4-year-old to whom I will be teaching English/music/English-through-music once a week. She's a very sweet girl, but she doesn't speak a word of English, and I'm a little apprehensive about the whole arrangement. In all probability, it will turn out fine. I met with the mother, who was very nice and assured me that they weren't necessarily expecting significant progress to be made in the English department. They just wanted someone to play with her and speak to her in English, and since they knew I was a singer, they figured the best way for this to work would be through music. Oy, the situations I get myself into just by being a musician. I'm not complaining, especially since it's my ONLY job prospect as this point. I just feel like I'm probably going to be a little aimless with the endeavor for the first few weeks. Also, on Friday night, the dish in which we were heating our dinner of leftovers in the oven exploded quite unexpectedly. So rather than attempt to pick the glass shards out of the food, we went out to dinner. We found this very nice, very cool restaurant in the Old Town called Il Grottino (The Grotto), which is quite literally carved out of what was once the stone fortress of Anguillara. It was so amazing, but I didn't bring my camera! =( I've learned my lesson: I will try to always have my camera with me from now on, no matter how much I think I won't need it.
Saturday wasn't terribly exciting, except that there was a motor show going on in town when Kristoffer and I went out grocery shopping. We also took a walk around a good chunk of our side of the lake, which was pretty nifty.
We couldn't bear to lose our growing reputation for doing interesting things on Sundays, so yesterday we took the FM3 (the regional train that we take in and out of the city) as far north as it goes to do a bit of exploring in the small city of Viterbo. At Liz's request, we kissed quite a few things in Viterbo, which were all documented in a rather amusing photo series, which can be found on facebook and snapfish.
So finally, that brings us to today. This morning I was invited by our landlord Alina to come upstairs (they live in the two floors above us) for a women's breakfast group that was meeting at her house. It's a gathering of women from all sorts of different countries who live in the area and meet for breakfast once a month, a different woman hosting each month. Since this month it happened to be Alina that was hosting, she invited me so I could meet some other English-speaking women in the area. It was great fun! There were so many different countries represented: Poland, France, Norway, Belgium, Germany... I was the only one from the States. There was a woman from Paris named Flora who was especially nice to me, as she sat next to me and kept me up to speed with the primary conversation occurring at the table, since most of the women kept accidentally reverting to Italian or German. She and Alina both teach at the local music school, so they invited me to come be part of a choir that is directed primarily in English. Annelise, from Norway, promised to give my number to some other American musicians she knows who play in the orchestra for the Rome Opera and have some other musical connections in the city. (Hmm, this whole music thing just seems to keep coming up. Maybe I'm supposed to do something with it?) And Natalie from Belgium directed me to some websites for associations of American women in Rome. All in all, it was a very enjoyable and very productive morning! Hopefully more good will come of it.
As to my current reading selection, not only do I highly enjoy this book, but I don't think I have ever identified more with a character than I identify with Fanny Price. I took an online "which Jane Austen heroine are you?" quiz once and got Fanny Price as my result. I didn't think much of it at the time because I had never read Mansfield Park, but now that I have (or am, rather), I can fairly comment on how disturbingly accurate the quiz results were. She's socially awkward in all kinds of familiar ways, and she spends almost the entire novel being reminded of how undeserving she is to have anything fine, which only reinforces this belief which preexisted in herself, independent of any outside influences. She feels and notices everything in everyone, but keeps it all quietly to herself, never letting on how tormented she sometimes is by the truths hidden within her that no one else can (or even wants to) see. I could go on, but it would likely only confuse and bore you. Let it suffice to say that I think I have a greater understanding of myself, or at least of qualities that I once more fully embodied, as a result of reading this book.
I am also curious how obvious the changes in my writing style are, depending on what I'm reading at the time. To me, they seem very obvious, especially when I'm reading something like Jane Austen, because the language is so particular. I find myself writing and saying things in a way I wouldn't normally. It's kind of novel to me really. I enjoy hearing these oddly elegant and wordy phrases unwittingly escaping my lips. See, I'm even doing it now. Who says "unwittingly escaping my lips"?
Comments (3)
Good heavens, every time I read this I turn so green with envy I look like the Hulk.
But I'm really commenting to say I do that thing too, where I absorb other people's writing styles. When it's Austen it's especially bad, I even start talking that way.
A. I love your vocabulary in this entry. Nice lexicon.
B. Glad you conquered something you didn't enjoy formerly. Sounds like it was a good experience to have.
C. Yeah Beth Moore!!
D. The music thing...there's something to it. How poetic that you be in ROME of all places experiencing this.
E. I'm glad you're meeting all sorts of great people and having wonderful experiences.
F. As far as the teaching English goes, I can give you a few ideas if you want them... Namely just have simple conversation with her - weather, colors, numbers, talk about herself, etc. Easy questions/answers always work well. Teach her simple songs that kids learn in English too, that might help. I have other stuff if you want it.
G. I miss you lots!!
@Lindsers83Â - I miss you too!